Who's Sorry Now?

Michael Vick is sorry. Sorry that he has gotten caught? Vick confirmed in a TV interview that he met with NFL commissioner Roger Goodell to discuss problems that have plagued the Atlanta Falcons' quarterback this offseason.

"After what happened ... I just wanted to crawl in a hole. I can't take it no more," Vick told ESPN. "I walk around with a smile on my face and act like I'm happy, but on the inside it's hurting. And it's killing me. I ain't got no more energy left for it. The more I continue to do things and my name is in the media, I'm not going to get anywhere."

Sure Mike.

See Ya!

Maybe Al Davis is not as senile as we think and maybe Bill Belichick is. It looks as if NFL Oakland Raiders slacker Randy Moss will be traded to the Pats.

There are still details to be completed, including Moss passing a physical examination by the Patriots' medical staff, but league sources said they expect the deal to be competed. As part of a trade, Moss would restructure and perhaps even extend his current contract, which calls for base salaries of $9.75 million in 2007 and $11.25 million in 2008.

Oakland and New England officials conducted on and off negotiations for the last several days. The Raiders, who acquired Moss from Minnesota in 2005, have been shopping the wide receiver much of the offseason.

More Money Than Brains

Dallas Cowboys owner and general manager Jerry Jones said for the first time that he is committed to paying wide receiver Terrell Owens' $3 million roster bonus, due in June. That means that Owens will remain with Dallas regardless of how the Cowboys address the position in this weekend's draft. Let the fun begin.

Let The Games Begin

Are we ready for the NFL draft tomorrow? I think this has been over hyped ad nauseum by ESPN. Do these commentators get paid by the word?

So what awards can be handed out pre-draft?

Homer Award: Mike Golic for telling us that Brady Quinn is the best darn football player ever. Really?

Overhyped Athlete: Brady Quinn. This guy is overrated and overhyped.

In A Daze Award: Is it just me or does Steve Young seem to be in a daze?

Smug and Cocky Award: Mel Kiper seems to be looking down at the rest of the peon analysts.

Overkill Award: No contest-ESPN.

A Black Eye

The Columbia Broadcasting Sleaze Network is refusing to air a Maxfli commercial(shown below) of John Daly because he may be drinking beer while driving a golf cart. Oh my! This is the network that has more sleaze than Maxfli has balls.

"It did not meet the standards of the CBS network," spokeswoman LeslieAnn Wade said Tuesday, quoted in The Los Angeles Times. "Any implied or direct reference to excessive consumption of alcohol would not meet network guidelines."

Wade said that the CBS guidelines do not allow alcoholic beverages to appear in ads when an activity involves a level of alertness, the paper reported.

Give us all a break CBS and just shut up!

Vick Sticks It To Congress

Michael Vick is at it again. This time his target is Congress. The Falcons quarterback was scheduled to lobby on Capitol Hill, hoping to persuade lawmakers to increase funding for after-school programs. But Vick missed a connecting flight in Atlanta and failed to show for his Tuesday morning appearance.

Vick's publicist, Susan Bass, said it wasn't his fault. The AirTran flight was late leaving Tampa, Vick missed his connection and wound up stuck in Atlanta, Bass said.

"He was really mad," Bass said.

AirTran, which has an endorsement deal with Vick, gave a different account of Vick's travel arrangements. While acknowledging that the flight from Florida was late getting into Atlanta, causing him to miss his 8:35 p.m. connection, airline spokesman Tad Hutcheson said the player was booked on a 10:50 p.m. flight.

Vick failed to show and the flight left Atlanta with about 20 empty seats, Hutcheson said.

What a class act this guy is.

Rob Parker Is A Moron

I thought that I had heard a lot of outlandish and moronic comments but the one from so called sports columnist Rob Parker takes the cake.

This buffoon and moron had the audacity to call Hank Aaron a coward because he refuses to go see Bonds break his home run record. This guy couldn't carry Hank's jock strap much less make any comments about why Hank will not show up to congratulate Barry "The Roid" Bonds.

Mr. Manning Goes To Washington

Lefty Looking For Answers

Phil Mickelson is changing coaches, saying Monday he will start working with Butch Harmon. This is in light of his driver issues that cost him a chance to win the U.S. Open last year at Winged Foot.

Mickelson had worked most of his career with Rick Smith, whom he credited for helping him win 30 times on the PGA Tour and three majors.

Here's some free advice Lefty. Put the driver in the bag sometimes. Or does the driver make you feel like a big "boy"?

Cock Fight

Hide the women and children.There may be a cock fight about to begin. University of South Carolina trustees have sought this past week to rein in an athletics department that several trustees said was making large financial deals without required board approval.

“This is a violation of the policy of the university. This is symptomatic of the behavior of the athletics department, and it needs to stop,” said trustee Mack Whittle, who is chairman of The South Financial Group of Greenville.

Sweet Home Alabama

It doesn't take much to please Bama fans. Why, they will pack the stadium to see a sprng game.

An overflow crowd of 92,138-plus fans attended the Crimson Tide's spring game Saturday, nearly doubling the school's A-Day attendance record and forcing university officials to start turning people away in the first half.

"It shows the passion that people have for the University of Alabama, and it certainly makes me feel great about being here as head coach," Nick The Liar Saban said.

Crocodile Tears

Pacman is now sorry. He bought a full page ad in a local newspaper to say that he is sorry for his past behavior and actions. Wonder if he is sorry now that his mutimillion dollar contract is gone? I don't recall the Pacman apologizing to anyone before now.

Down The Toilet

Seems that former Oklahoma Sooner and Heisman trophy winner Billy Sims is still not fond of the Texas Longhorns.

Sims who is part owner of the Billy Sims Barbecue in Tulsa which has a toilet that features an upside-down Longhorn in the bowl.

A Tip Of The Cap

We have two different views of MLB players. The ones with class were the Washington Nationals who wore Virginia Tech baseball caps during Tuesday night's game against the Atlanta Braves as a tribute to the victims of Monday's shooting rampage at the school.

The other is Barry Bonds who now is blaming the media for the rift between himself and Hank Aaron. What? Barry does not seem to undertand that the rift is due to the fact that Hank does not want to be associated with an enhanced roid athlete. Period.

Cocky

Never let it be said that Steve Spurrier is swayed by what is right. Tle loud mouthed head Cock lifted the suspension of South Carolina quarterback Stephen Garcia, arrested twice this year,the school confirmed Tuesday.

The highly-touted recruit, who graduated high school early to get a jump on learning Spurrier's offense, attended a team meeting Monday and will be allowed to go to workouts. "It was coach's decision," athletic department spokesman Steve Fink said.

No Boo Boo

Does the PGA tour have a new hero? Maybe and his name is Boo Weekley. He won the Verizon Heritage on Monday and has captured the interest of the media and public.

Weekley is not your ordinary golf hero. To say that he is somewhat unusual would be an understatement. A couple of things will highlight this colorful character:

His real name is Thomas Brent Weekley, but he was given the nickname as a child because he liked Yogi Bear's sidekick, Boo-Boo.

He attended Abraham Baldwin Agricultural College where he studied turf grass science.

When Boo first played the PGA Tour in 2002, he wore camouflage pants and tennis shoes during tournaments. He has since toned down to rain pants and golf spikes (he only found traditional shoes that didn't hurt his feet within the past three years).

Oh, and there is a story about an orangutan which is for another post.

One Hit Wonder

Cleveland Indians pitcher C.C. Sabathia pitched eight overpowering innings Sunday and Grady Sizemore hit a leadoff double in the first -- Cleveland's only hit -- as the Indians finished a bizarre, two-city homestand with a 2-1 victory over the Chicago White Sox

The Great Chicago Bid

Chicago became the official choice for the U.S. Olympic Committee for the Olympic venue in 2016.

The Windy City's bid to hold a Summer Games for the first time moved to the international stage Saturday when the U.S. Olympic Committee capped a yearlong search for an American candidate for 2016 by picking Chicago over two-time host Los Angeles.

What Rhymes With Nick And Starts With "P"?

Seems that the honeymoon may be over for the truth challenged Nick Saban. According to one source, Saban cancelled an interview last weekend with CNNSI's Stewart Mandel. Mandel reported that in canceling, Saban barked at an athletics department official, "I don't have time for this shit."

Another comment from Montgomery Advertiser columnist Josh Moon was not as kind to Saban after the coach refused to make players available to the media last week. Wrote Moon: "Let's be real here, Nick Saban's reputation is mostly hype. He was overrated at Michigan State, overrated at LSU and rated about right in Miami. He's an average coach who, through mostly media attention, has garnered this reputation of being a great coach."

Nif-Wrong

The district attorney in the Duke lacrosse sexual assault case apologized to the three athletes in a carefully worded statement Thursday as lawyers weighed whether to sue him .

Some legal analysts are saying that traditional immunity protection probably doesn't cover some of Mike Nifong's more questionable actions in his handling of the case.

No Bonding For Hank

Don't expect Hank Aaron to be anywhere close to Barry Bonds if or when he breaks his home run record.

"Uh-uh. No, no. I'm not going to be around," Aaron was quoted as saying in Tuesday's editions of The Atlanta Journal-Constitution.

Aaron said he wouldn't attend if Bonds were within reach of the record when the San Francisco Giants play at Atlanta from Aug. 14-16. Hank also stated "I'm 72 years old, and I'm not hopping on a plane and flying all the way to San Francisco for anybody."

Pacman and Henry Drop Kicked

Adam "Pacman" Jones of Tennessee was suspended Tuesday for the 2007 NFL season and Chris Henry of Cincinnati received an eight-game suspension -- both for numerous violations of the NFL's personal conduct policy.The two players are suspended without pay and will lose over a million dollars in pay during the suspension.

Snow Job

With the grounds crew still shoveling snow off the field, the Cleveland Indians decided it was time to head north to Milwaukee.

The Indians moved their series against the Los Angeles Angels to Milwaukee's Miller Park after a spring snowstorm wiped out Cleveland's series against Seattle for the fourth straight day Monday.

MLB Commissioner Bud Selig said it's tough to avoid weather problems. Selig said the solution isn't as simple as scheduling more games in warmer climates. Mmmmm...ok, Commish. Or perhaps that is just a snow job by you.

"Eggs"citing Finish!

The golfer with the last name Woods and the wooden personality did not win the Masters. Relatively unknown thirty-one year old Zach Johnson pulled away from Woods and the rest of the pack with three birdies in a crucial four-hole stretch along the back nine of Augusta National, closing with a 69 for a two-shot victory and only the second of his career.

Not Good To Arm A Gator

Florida offensive lineman Ronnie Matthew Wilson was arrested Thursday, accused of firing a semiautomatic rifle in the air during a dispute with another man that started in a nightclub.

Wilson, 19, has been suspended from team activities, coach Urban Meyer said. Wilson was charged with aggravated assault, simple battery and the use or display of a concealed weapon during the commission of a felony, according to jail records.

"Obviously, this is a major concern," Meyer said. Gee, coach, you think it is a major concern? Duh!

Imus Steps In It

Radio and TV jock Don Imus apologized Friday for calling the Rutgers University women's basketball team "nappy headed hos" on his nationally syndicated program.

The National Association of Black Journalists demanded his immediate firing after the man known as "Imus in the Morning" put his foot deep in his mouth Wednesday. Imus questioned the players' looks, describing them as tattooed "rough girls." His producer compared the team -- which has eight black members -- to the NBA's Toronto Raptors.

Easter Parade

Billy Loves Hogtown

Billy Donovan has decided that he loves Hogtown.He indicated today that he will stay at Florida. "After finally having an opportunity to sit down with my family, and with [Florida athletic director] Jeremy Foley, I've decided that I will remain at the University of Florida," said Donovan, who served as an assistant under Rick Pitino at Kentucky. "I have great respect for the University of Kentucky, its great history and tradition, and I had five wonderful years in Lexington. That being said, I'm very proud of what we've built here at the University of Florida and I look forward to continuing to build on it."

Rest In Peace

No Bush Allowed At Playboy Mansion

Former USC and Heisman Trophy winning tailback Reggie Bush has been banned from the Playboy Mansion, according to Scott Wolf of the L.A. Daily News.

Writes Wolf: "Our spies tell us former USC tailback Reggie Bush is persona non grata at the Playboy Mansion because of a conduct violation. And no, it was nothing involving a Playmate."

Holy Toledo!

Federal authorities have charged a University of Toledo football player Friday in connection with a point-shaving scheme.

Harvey "Scooter" McDougle Jr. recruited Toledo football and basketball players to participate in the scheme orchestrated by a Sterling Heights man identified only as "Gary," according to a criminal complaint filed in U.S. District Court.

McDougle was arraigned Friday on charges of participating in a bribery scheme to influence sporting contests, The Detroit News reported on its Web site. He was released on a $10,000 bond and a preliminary hearing was scheduled for April 20.

Swinging Gates

Here's a shocker. Another NFL player is in trouble with the law. Buccaneers running back Lionel Gates was arrested and charged with hitting a pregnant woman in the face and pushing her into a wall during an argument.